Part II of Reality Therapy:
Without a special involvement the patient will be unable to fulfill his needs, according to Glasser. Well meaning advice always fails when there is insufficient involvement because all people have the same needs that do not vary with age, sex, or race. Reality therapy recognizes two basic needs. First, is the need to love and be loved. Second, is the need to feel that we are worthwhile to ourselves and to others. Throughout life our health and happiness depend upon our ability to love and be loved, Glasser suggests. However, love should not be a blanket approval of everything the other person does. To be worthwhile we must maintain a satisfactory standard of behavior. We must learn to both correct ourselves when we do wrong and credit ourselves when we do right. Unless we learn these two basic needs, we feel pain or discomfort in some form. Yet, if we are unable to love, we may avoid others to prevent the pain of rejection.
Glasser believes that if the involvement is broken at any time we very quickly become unable to satisfy our needs. I have to disagree with this premise. Life goes on and there are plenty more people out there to replace that one that is no longer available. To say that we become “unable” to satisfy our needs is a little too strong for my plate.